SCENE #1: “CONAN WEEKNIGHTS AT 11/10c” AND TBS LOGO APPEARS ON SCREEN
Music plays in background.
SCENE #2: RICKY GERVAIS AND CONAN O'BRIEN APPEAR ON SCREEN, GERVAIS IS SIPPING WATER
Crowd cheers
Conan: Ahh. Mmm.
Gervais: Thank you.
SCENE #3: GERVAIS AND CONAN SIT UP
Conan: How are you? Nice to have you here.
Gervais: Oh, it’s great to be here. You have a nice new studio.
Conan: This is new, this is a new experience.
Gervais: Yeah, yeah it’s quite different.
Conan: Giant moon, big fake moon behind you.
Gervais: Actually, the, uh, studio was easier to find than the channel on the TV.
SCENE #4: CONAN HITS TABLE, BRINGS HAND TO FACE
Conan and Gervais laugh, crowd laughs
SCENE #5: GERVAIS ACTS OUT CHANGING THE CHANNEL WITH A REMOTE
Gervais: But I persevered.
Conan: Yeah, really, it takes a while.
Gervais: I didn’t, I didn’t know…
SCENE #6: PAN IN ON GERVAIS
Gervais: … there were that many channels, to be honest.
SCENE #7: PAN OUT TO CONAN AND GERVAIS
Conan: I didn’t until we came to this channel, I didn’t realize. And I’ll be honest with you, I sometimes forget where we are in Los Angeles.
Gervais: Yeah, yeah, right.
Conan: What are we on here?
Richter: I have no idea.
SCENE #8: PAN OUT TO SEE ANDY RICHTER IN SHOT
Richter: I always get stuck on the…
SCENE #9: CLOSE-UP ON RICHTER
Laughter
Richter: …costume jewelry, then I just…
Gervais: Oh, wait you, no you, you go through that…
SCENE #10: PAN BACK TO CONAN AND GERVAIS
Laughter from crowd throughout scene
Gervais: …You keep going, you go through costume jewelry and eyebrow plucking channel, then you know.
Conan: And then eventually you find…
Gervais: Osama Bin Laden’s got a chat show just before yours.
Conan: It’s very good. He’s killing us with the bookings. Uh, now, uh tell me, let’s talk about your gig that’s coming up: The Golden Globes. People love it when you host this show, you’re very good at it. There was a perception a little bit last year that you, you were very good, but you didn’t go for the jugular.
Gervais: Uh, that’s what I think, I think, I think I…
SCENE #11: CLOSE-UP ON GERVAIS, HE POINTS TO CROWD
Laughter from crowd
Gervais: …In retrospect, I think I held back a little bit. You know, I didn’t wanna—I didn’t wanna offend anyone, but I didn’t wanna be totally ou—well…She loved it.
SCENE #12: PAN OUT TO CONAN AND GERVAIS
Laughter from crowd
Conan: Yeah, she—one out of two hundred people always will.
Gervais: But you know, I just wanna do, uh…
SCENE #13: CLOSE-UP ON GERVAIS
Gervais: …I wanna do a proper job this year. The thing is I haven’t run anything by them. The good thing about it is that they don’t wanna see anything, they said that last year. I don’t show them the script, and um I had to tell them about one thing I wanted to do. ‘Cause I need—it was a bit of a stunt—and I needed their cooperation and I needed a costume, and I told them and they said ‘No we can’t do that.’ So I…
Conan: Oh, they turned you down already?
SCENE #14: PAN OUT TO CONAN AND GERVAIS
Gervais: So I’m not telling them anything.
Conan: Can you tell us what that idea was? So we, we know?
Gervais: Yeah…
SCENE #15: CLOSE-UP ON GERVAIS
Gervais: It wasn’t that—yeah, um. No what it was…
Conan: Maybe we could use it.
SCENE #16: PAN OUT TO CONAN AND GERVAIS
Gervais: I wanted it to be the opening, you know…
SCENE #17: CLOSE-UP ON GERVAIS
Laughter from crowd
Gervais: Rick—‘Please welcome Ricky Gervais’ and I was gonna come out dressed as Adolf Hitler…Right?
